Why is it hard to let go?

I've been wondering why I have the hardest time of letting go. Every time I find an answer to a question my mind asks, another one pops. It seems never-ending. My mind wants to move on because it knows that it's best for me but it can't win the illusion that covers it. I can't stop imagining. The illusions are too powerful that I can't stop but imagine things that I know would never ever happen. I cant understand myself why I am letting myself be drowned by this foolishness. All I know is that I'm happy even I know it's impossible. These thoughts make me happy; temporary it may be but this makes me alive for the moment. Deep within me knows that friendship is the only possible thing you could ever offer. And I am cool with that. I don't want more. I am just filling in the things that I know that can't happen with me and you through the scenes I make in my mind. I may sound crazy. Many may not understand me. But I just want to make myself happy. Is it hard to understand? I am doing this because I still believe that what can't happen in the real world, can be possible in the world of imagination.

In time, I will be able to fully let go. It's hard, it's painful. But it's worth the tears.

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