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Saturday, November 6, 2010
This policy is valid from 06 November 2010
Posted by lloyd belleza at 8:58 PM
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Sunday, August 1, 2010
When things go badly wrong, or when we think we are in our worst self, we tend to push away the people that dearly love us, thinking that it is the way to save them from the misery and problems that we have. But is it really what we want to do? Is it the best way? Is it right in the first place?
Why do we think that it is saving them from misery? Are we in the best position to say that they are better off without us? Don't we consider what they think, what they prefer to do?
In our darkest moments, in our lowest points, only those who truly love us will stand by, for, and with us. If they want to stick in our lives, who are we push to them away? Are we not being arrogant?
We need love in this life. We need not all, but few people who are willing to stay no matter what, despite all the problems and adversities. But staying means being wanted to stay. A simple admission that we want them to stay, and that they are appreciated, will do. We don't need to give so much time, so much effort, so much money. Just don't push them away and they will stay.
If they truly love us, they will really stay. But again, just don't push them away but rather thank them for the love and company. They are the treasures in this life that we can keep for life. It's hard to lose such treasures.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
The whole summer I have been so confused on what career path to take. Because of this, lots of problems branched out. Relationships were tested. I battled with myself.
Now, when so much had happened, I am stronger. I am very happy of where I am now. Being a faculty member of the division I love so much, there is so much fulfillment.
Also, I have learned to be more understanding and more open to the possibilities. To be patient and to trust for the perfect time are the two things that I am proud to have learned.
Many things are still about to happen. I may not be always in my best self to face them but I know I am stronger now. :)
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Wednesday, April 28, 2010
At this modern day, it is so hard to believe into something until it actually happens.
Probably because of the hurt of broken promises that we actually become scared of believing that they do come true; that we sometimes feel that being too hopeful would just lead to disappointment.
It may be hard to believe but that is what we have to do. We have to have faith and trust.
Things may not always happen as we expected. Promises may be broken at times.
But these should not hinder us from believing and hoping that promises may still come true; and that our dreams may still happen.
We have to continue to hope and believe yet not expect too much.
When things happen as we hoped to be, let’s rejoice but if not, then believe there are better things to come or maybe it will just happen later.
I learned that optimism is really helpful and that it’s the better option.
Rough times are inevitable but we can do something on how we see and deal with things.
And it should be in the positive way.
This would be probably the last Summer break of my life. After this, I may not be able to experience this anymore because work knows no Summer break. I say that this time is a very crucial time for me. This time is the time to reflect and decide on what path to choose. I would be experiencing a transition that would somehow forever change my life. In this crucial time, I want and need support from people I love and trust because in every decision I make and take I always consider them. Quality time this Summer is all I ask. This is just all I want before a new chapter of my life starts. Before my freedom ends.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Saturday, January 2, 2010
As 2010 starts, I just would like to recall some memories (highlights) of the previous year.
We celebrated New Year (2009) with so much glee. The Belleza Family was complete that time. My aunt from Japan came back to celebrate Christmas and New Year with us in Davao.
This was also the time I took courage to run for CS Rep in the Samahan Elections.
My celebration was not that happy that year. Unlike in 2008, no birthday surprises, less gifts, and friends did not come to my house to celebrate with my family and me. I would say it was not that fun but I still cherished that day, my last teenage celebration.
I was elected as the new CS Rep. It was amazing how my batch mates and friends supported me all throughout the campaign period.
This was also the time that our place was caught in fire. It was devastating because lots of houses were burned but fortunately ours was spared. I could still remember how I reacted when my mom called and told me about it. She was telling me that maybe when we get there, we would only see ashes and what remained from the fire. I was in shock. I could not articulate what I felt that time. I was doing GACP work, I still had the guts to finish it while whispering my prayers to the Lord. I was like walking heading to nowhere. I did not want to feel anything that time. I was like hopeless but I was still praying. The ride from school to our house was like the longest travel I have ever had. I was imagining the house and what could it be after the fire. I was thinking of a heavy rain or maybe a tidal wave could help stop the fire. I thought of almost everything that I was hoping God would do just to stop the fire. When I got there, people were crying. It was very smoky. Dark, suffocating smokes were everywhere. It was so crowded with people and saved stuffs. I met my aunt and told me their home and the houses in front of ours were all gone. And the best thing I heard was, our house was safe. It was amazing. I couldn’t thank enough the Lord for answering my prayer. The house in front of ours, which is like 6 human steps away, was totally eaten by fire. It’s really a miracle. I couldn’t stop crying when I got into the house.
Another tragedy that struck the family was that with my Lolo. He got totally sick that he was in the ICU for quite some time. He had heart, lung, and kidney failure; and some other diseases due to old age. It was so hard for the family, emotionally and financially. It was very sad and traumatic.
The saddest month of the year. We lost our dear Lolo on the 7th of this month. After almost a month in the ICU, Lolo passed away during his dialysis. I heard the news through a text from my sister. She said Lolo was gone. I was in Kimmy’s house doing SAD and Thesis. I paused and told my friends that my Lolo passed away. I smiled, bowed my head and started crying. It was very painful. I couldn’t believe that it was really true. I was expecting him to be OK. I was wishing that he’ll be in my graduation. I excused myself, went to the bedroom and cried silently. I woke up early so I could go home as early as possible. When I got there, Lolo was already upstairs, resting. I’ve never seen this happy family so sad before. Some were fighting their tears back, some were really crying. I was afraid to show my tears, so I always go to the room when I couldn’t stop my tears from falling. We were in pain but we were strong as a family. Knowing that we’re there for each other gave us the strength to face the loss, to accept, to see the light. March 16th, the burial, was the culmination. It was the saddest. People were crying. Some were wailing. I couldn’t stop crying. The last look was so painful. But again, we had to be strong. After it, every Monday, we visit Lolo.
June - December
I met new friends and family mostly from Samahan Central Board, my CSSEC family (Yang2x, Chuch, Marian, Eaque, CJ, Karen, Jem, Kring, Morny, Kimmy, Jeff, Kamz, Jake, Raffy, Paolo) and Bahaghari—my B family (Jazi, Drew and Jefford) w/ Ianne, Kuya Kevz, Ate Sheng, Beiah, etc. Of course, I could not forget my kambal, Jonathan, who eventually became my best friend. During this period, I was hooked with my responsibility as the CS Rep and somehow did not give much priority on my academics. This also was the period when I learned to appreciate the tragedies that happened to my family and me in the earlier half of the year. I also became happier and amazed of the beautiful things that were happening in my life. I could never thank God enough for making me wonderfully happy despite the losses and pains. It’s amazing how His plans work. God really knows what to do to fill in the voids in my heart, to make me feel special and loved. There were also first times that I’ve done this year that helped me learn more about life. I became more patient and understanding. And of course, been able to become a better person.
This year has been very significant to my life. I lost some, but I earned a lot. The tragedies and pains made me a better person. It made me appreciate God’s plans more. So this 2010, I have a strong and happy heart to face the new challenges and experience more happiness and wonderful blessings.